He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
Skipping work because i'm still too drunk from last night still. got home at midnight and passed out in front of my door for 2 hours bc i couldn't find my key
had to call my rooommate to let us in. Passed out in my dress and found the key on my hair tie-in my hair- just now.
Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
Woke up this morning 8 levels higher in Call of Duty then when I started drinking... told you I was better when I was drunk.
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Randomize
