He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
In a shocking revelation, I learned that the Easter Sunday shit show happened not because of vodka but because my gay neighbor drugged me.
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
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