so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
He somehow managed to accomplish karate kicking a door down, cockblocking my friend in the room, and writing "tits" all over the house with a blue sharpie.
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
Fell in the ditch running from the pizza guy I stole the pizza from. If you are still at my house come find me, pretty sure I need stitches.
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
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