Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
I'm sorry I murdered your sperm with my alcohol saturated Olympic uterus.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
Randomize
