You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
I just projectile vomited in a Methodist church parking lot. If Jesus didn't love me before he sure as hell doesn't now.
I just woke up in my closet, wearing a pink cowboy hat and a pink thong...
I want my thong back.
I hate you tequila.
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
Randomize
