PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
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