Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
just accidentally masturbated with tiger balm. best. accident. ever.
I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
Sex on the scooter in the parking lot wasn't the smartest idea. Actual quote from the cop as he handed me the ticket and fist bumped me.
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
Randomize
