Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
Randomize
