what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
She's trying to sext her husband for the first time. I'm feeding her lines. It is 3 am and I am playing Cyrano for my wasted big sister TELL ME I AM NOT THE BEST SISTER IN LAW ON THE PLANET.
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
Randomize
