Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
In other news, I'm pretty sure my mom was encouraging me to have a threesome yesterday... I don't even want to start digging in that garden of horror and trauma.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
You ever have a fart follow you around?
Randomize
