he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
I can't believe we just used the phrase "jizz to juice ratio" in casual conversation.
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
