Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
I swear it's like I have a jerk off quota I have to meet each week. If I miss three days I have a wet dream and it's like a wasted jizz, and it gets everywhereeeeeee.
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
Randomize
