Reason #3 women are better than men: texting and peeing simultaneously. Write THAT in the fucking snow.
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
Randomize
