There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
Whenever you feel bad about your life, just remember the time I tried to swim while high and thought for a minute I was genuinely drowning
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
