You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
Randomize
