She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
is this the sara with the beer cane?
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
Playing Cards Against Humanity with my relatives at Christmas while I'm stoned was a bad idea...
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
Randomize