I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
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