Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
Siri makes being stoned even easier. I don't even Have to type my texts myself
Though I typed a half of that one
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
Randomize
