I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
Pants are for mortals
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
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