i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
DAMN! I hate it when i drunkenly erase all my "sent message" and wake up in the morning and my inbox is full of "WTF?" and "Huh?" messages.
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
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