you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
The bartender just legitimately thanked me for breaking the cycle of speed metal by playing mmmbop.
i don't think that has ever happened before in the history of man
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
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