It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
Well I found out I was essentially dumped and replaced by a hipster and apparently offered a girl $95 to go out with me. In the spirit of the Olympics I will not be spending any time on the medal stand.
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
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