Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
My new years resolution is going to be to stop drunk snapchatting old hook ups asking them when we're going to bang again
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
Randomize
