i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
