it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
I woke up to you singing What Makes You Beautiful and trying to blend an avocado with vodka.
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
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