That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
Randomize
