So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
Can vaginas get frostbite?
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
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