I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
