How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
Got free coffee because I told the guy at starbucks the pleats in his khaki pants made his cock look big.
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
Randomize
