I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
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