i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
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