The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
I told him he was a man of science and that he should conduct experiments on my tits to see how they stay up. I need you to hold onto my larynx when I'm drunk.
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
He woke me up at 5am to recite nursery rhymes to our fictitious unborn child.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
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