Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Randomize