i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
either way he was missing a nipple.
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
Randomize
