If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
are you so shy because you have an std?
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
Right now, millions of people are waking up to get ready for work, start their day, and be productive members of society. I just found a 40 stashed in my fridge. I'm getting daybreak drunk. Zero fucks are given.
Isn't being unemployed beautiful sometimes?
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
Randomize
