Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
Randomize
