all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
You tried tipping the cashier at Cook Out by shoving a dollar bill down his shirt and yelling "Magic Mike"
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
I just gave myself a foot massage. #SingleAsFuck
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy
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