i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
I just got really nervous and swallowed all of my birth control
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
Ya’ll! My debit card got switched with my boss’ at lunch today (both Red Wells Fargo)....I realized it at whole foods AFTER I ran it for $100 at Vanity Room getting my vaj waxed 🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️. Most awkward IOU ever tomorrow.
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