Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
halfway through eating me out he goes 'oh that reminds me i have to buy fish for good friday'
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
Correction: Jimmy johns. The one pita pit employee has been an asshole to me ever since you locked them out of the store
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
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