best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
Your first words after putting out the flames, "how am I supposed to eat girls out with my top lip burned off??"
Yeah no more flaming everclear shots.
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
That's just a really flattering way of saying, "Yes, you're useless, but you have great tits."
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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