one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Randomize
