I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that.
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
cat food counts as protein by the way
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
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