DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
The waitress bought us a round. She said if anyone could do 52 margarita mondays in a row, it was us.
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
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