if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
Met my future wife peeing in the men's room. I stood in for the missing door on the stall. We really hit it off talking about how her butt didn't even touch the seat from all the years of squat lifting in high school.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
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