capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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