Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
Sorry about all the noise last night. We were trying to break bottles by kicking soccer balls at them. If it's any consolation, there's shattered glass and blood all over my kitchen.
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
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