did i leave my keys in your car? BTW: sorry for throwing that drink on your date.
Screwed.edu
My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
Randomize
