whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
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