We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
Semen is not good for contacts.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
I don't know whether to be insulted or flattered that I am being propositioned to have a threesome only if I wear my cat onesie
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
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