I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
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