I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
Randomize
